The fall season is not just a time of year when we dress up and ask strangers for candy- although that’s super fun!
During this time, the veil between our world and the next is at its thinnest- so it’s no wonder we celebrate holidays like Halloween, Día de los Muertos and others all around the world meant to honor those who have gone before us.
The History of Halloween… the very QUICK and ROUGH version!
Halloween has its roots in an ancient Celtic festival called Samhain, marking the beginning of winter. It’s believed that the night before Samhain, on October 31st, spirits come from the other world to destroy all the vegetation, leaving the land barren in preparation for winter.
As time went on, the pagan tradition was adopted by the Christian church and Samhain became All Saint’s Day- praising all Hallowed Saints on November 1st. All Hallows Eve was the evening before All Saint’s Day that eventually became named Halloween. In addition, November 2nd is All Souls’ Day. This is a day dedicated to remembering our friends and loved ones who have passed. So what originated as Samhain is now 3 separate days of celebration!
Similarly, Mexico’s Día de los Muertos remembers the dead by honoring children and infants on November 1st and deceased adults on November 2nd.
Whatever you celebrate this season, these holidays are a reminder that our ancestors and loved ones who are no longer with us in this world, are not far away. They are constantly guiding and assisting us from the other side. These holidays and rituals are a wonderful way to acknowledge them.
What is a Ritual?
A meaningful, mindful, symbolic practice.
Rituals can come from our culture, religion or our individual guidance and spirituality. They can be simple or elaborate and can bring peace, healing, a feeling of connection etc…
I encourage you to create your own ritual for honoring those who have passed before you. If you look to other traditions, I invite you to not to mimic them but rather draw from their wisdom.
I’ve compiled some ideas to help you create your own ritual. You can start and end with just the first one or add other ideas from the list as you feel comfortable. Be open to what you are guided to incorporate- the further you go down the list, the more elaborate your ritual can be. In addition, know that you don’t have to do this alone. You can invite others to share and be a part of this experience.
Start with…
A white candle– This can be a glass pillar candle- they’re sold at most Target stores or large grocery stores. It can also be as simple as a tea light candle or any other white candle you have on hand. With the intention that this candle is lit in honor of your loved ones, you can use any candle you wish- I use white since it symbolizes peace.
You may want to light one single candle to symbolize more than one person or a few candles for different people. If you choose one candle for multiple loved ones, you can write the names of all those it’s intended for on the side in sharpie.
That’s it! Before lighting the candle, take a few deep breaths to center yourself. After it’s lit, you may choose to stop there, and that’s ok. Your loved ones understand this intention and that you are honoring their spirit.
To add a little more…
You might wish to sit in silence for bit, reflecting and sending love to those the candle is lit for.
If you feel the need to communicate something to your loved one, you can speak aloud, meditate or write a message to them on a piece of paper and place it underneath the candle.
To add even more…
You can surround the candle(s) with:
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Photos of your loved ones
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Mementos that remind you of them or that belonged to them
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Flowers
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A glass of water (an offering that also allows spirit energy to flow more freely)
You can also…
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Play music
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Burn sage or incense
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Say a prayer
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Read a poem or sacred text
Or… whatever you are called to do.
I invite you to spend as much time on this ritual as you feel comfortable with.
If it does become more elaborate, I encourage you to clearly mark the opening and the closing- perhaps with an “Amen”, thanking your loved ones or even blowing out the candle. Again, whatever you are comfortable with our guided to do. Marking the beginning and end of the ritual will help you transition into a different frame of mind at the start, and help ground you back to the present moment when you are finished.
You may decide to do a ritual like this just once a year, or on a regular basis for birthdays, anniversaries or whenever you need a little peace.
No matter what it turns out to be, I hope it brings you peace and continued healing knowing that your loved ones are always around to help guide you and send you love.
Always use caution when working with fire and never leave your candles unattended.